The Sound of the Broken Heart
by Befantastic
Summary: My love life through the eyes of various oneshots and songfics. Because things change and people change, but the love in your heart can always be the same.
1. You were my real love I never knew love

**And so it starts. From the first boy I've ever notice, and the first time I thought you could fall in love in 7th grade**

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You know the boy you were desperately in like with in kindergarten? You got married at recess, and became estranged when that knew girl came. But you were able to move on easily. A new boy your age moved into the house across the street. He's got blonde hair, and makes you laugh. You and your mommy both think he's _adorable_.

So now you're in 5th grade. You've liked boys for a very longtime. Or at least one boy. You're a smart little pre-teen. You realized at the tender age of eleven that the boy, who you'd thought of as a best friend for 6 years, is _cute_, and still hilarious. But unfortunately, he's not smart like you. He doesn't see people like you do. He likes that girl with that girl what that long black hair. He likes her looks. You hate her. She's rude and stuck up. You're his best friend, who he turned on. He hangs with her and her friends, laughing at your red hair.

You're a year older. Maybe a year wiser. He's no longer around. He goes to ADD, because he moved out of your neighborhood. You go to OCD, like most of your friends. So many new people. So many _new_boys. You find yourself falling for a new one. He's like the old one. Funny but unlike your 5th grade boy he's _hot_. They both pay soccer, making you excited whenever OCD and ADD face off, and he has a name like no other. You know he likes you. It's rather obvious. He flirts with you enough to make you forget that he went out with the same raven haired girl the _cute _one dated. He doesn't hide his feelings. When his friend says, "Josh thinks you're hot", in English act as if you're not interested. But you tell his friend to try it on Kristen, and sure enough Josh's confused. You're convinced that he wants you. Even though you hardly talk outside of the six classes you share. In math you sit next to him, ever moment you lose your breath. This is your chance.

He moved. You can't catch a break. You're full of regret for the first months of seventh grade. You hate that you didn't say how you feel when you had the chance. All the things left unsaid. For the first time in a long time, you don't like someone. Your focus is clear but you still chase after every guy with a nice smile. Until you reintroduce yourself to your new guy. You know him from sixth grade. He noticed you then, when you were an awkward twelve your old and he was a popular seventh grader. You were unintelligent. He asked if you had a boyfriend. You said no. It was until he wanted your name did you start to notice. You made him chase you, until giving in. You didn't like him though, you still wanted Josh. But so much has changed. The underlying want for him has come into play. You're mesmerized. He's gorgeous, hilarious; you regret not interacting with him sooner. He even said he liked you, as a friend but still that's something. Forget his girlfriend, and player ways. Your heart usually wants what it can't have.

That year closes. You remember the last real conversation. What he wore, how he sounded. You want to cry. What will you do? He was your year.

As a headstrong, confident eight grader, there's no one. You not over him. He haunts your memory and reinstated by the smallest thing, like your sister talking about how he's the star player on the JV Basketball team. When you see him at the staff basketball game, hosted by the high school, you're caught off guard. Your mind stuck on the smile that he flashed. Every memory crashing down. And then like magic, your Mom drags you to the Winter Break basketball tournaments. Only to see him. You _have _to see him. When you do the emotions overflow, you flirt, laugh, and afterwards your over everything. You get closure, something you were never able to have before. Sure, he's still the hottest, gorgeous boy you've meet. But you know that after all the boy you've fallen for he's just another one you won't have. You realize that he's moved on. That's okay, cause you've moved on.


	2. Cries cries cries in her lonley heart

_The song Lucky belongs to Britney Spears. I just have it on my iPod\_

_**Just so you know, I'm not anything like Massie in the book. But I have a pretty easy life so it goes....**_

_**This is the "8th grade boy"  
**_

_

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_

Massie Block has many things in her life. It was reasonably good, with an equally nice house, and cars. She wasn't Bill Gates rich but she also wasn't dirt poor, she had things that would make anybody happy. There was only one complaint. Next to not getting to call Cam Fisher her boyfriend, having to watch Olivia Ryan and her band of annoying bitch girls gush at him, and watch the two of them brush fingers, listening to the rumors of what they did at the movies.

God, Britney had it right. If nothing was missing in her life then why did tears come at night?

It wasn't like they were strangers. She'd wanted him since seventh grade when he kissed friend Alicia on a dare, and flirted with her. His attention also drifted towards Massie, in the hall, he'd open his arms for a hug and she obliged. Hoping that one day, the way she responded to a flirtatious remark, hug him back, smile for a laugh, would make him realize how dumb, obnoxious, immature and rude Olivia was. Oh, and her little friends too.

Maybe because she felt like she missed out. Ever the aggressor, Massie probably pushed him away. She had him. But she'd mess up and act mad. When in reality she was happy. Happy that finally she wasn't really chasing after a guy, that he wanted her. Or so she thought. Massie didn't take what she had and hold on to it. She was irresponsible.

They broke up. The best two weeks of her life. Olivia messed up, and Cam gave up. She had Cam's attention that was taken from her for an entire month. Massie didn't have to think about Olivia's mindless twits seeing them and reporting back to their master, who'd later attack her on Facebook when she got home. He was free, it seemed like he'd be that way forever. But Olivia knew how to get Cam back and when she did Massie's two weeks were over. She had two weeks. And she still didn't get him, Massie had failed. All that was next was moving on. Trying to forget everything.

But she still hopes, and in turn he still flirts. She tries not to get to confident. She knows that everything Cam's done with her; he's doing the same and maybe more with Olivia. That she was just his side girl. The one he'd have when she gave up on him. His little ego booster. Maybe his friend.

No matter how much she flirted. No matter how nice she was. Massie wasn't going to have Cam, unless he wised up and got her. Dump the girl who was more committed to her friends than him. Get with the one who truly wanted him. It was with Cam Fisher, Massie realized for the first time in her life, that she really couldn't get everything she wanted. That it was harder than she thought. She wasn't really happy because she didn't have him.


	3. Come in with the rain?

TaYlOr SwIfT is my reason for breathing some days. This is an old song like most my songfics will be because I'm going through a '99 pop music phase (Christina and Britney) and old Taylor songs. Sue me. I'm in an angst y mood because the guy I'm writing about is a douche.

But I'll get over it soon.

* * *

_I could go back to every laugh, but I don't wanna' go there anymore,and I know all the steps up to your door, but I don't wanna' go there anymore._

They say when your feeling down you should think of the good things that some from why you're sad. But I always do that. I always thought of the little things that Cam does. The way he _still _wants us to be the way we used to be. The way he make me smile, laugh and how he cares.

_Talk to the wind, talk to the sky, talk to the man with the reasons why, and let me know what you find._

But every time, I ran out of things. Leaving me hit with the reality that Cam didn't choose me. I knew how to get him, I tried so many times. It wasn't easy it took so much of me. How I could try to run into him in the hall, making it into class just in time. All habits, that I would have to get over._  
_  
_I'll leave my window open, 'Cause I'm too tired at night to call your name. Just know I'm right here hoping, that you'll come in with the rain._

Cam didn't know why. He'd ask about how I felt only for me to respond shortly and make excuses like, 'I'm mad' or 'God, I'm tired', because in reality I was. Tired of guessing and mad because he say all the things a girl would want to hear, only to go and make out with Kristen Gregory, the greater than thou girl you've never liked. _  
_

_I could stand up and sing you a song,_

I could be courageous, put myself out there forget about that über bitch Kristen; tell Cam how I felt ignoring all the negative outcomes. Make the giant leap of faith that could change every thing.

_But I don't wanna' have to go that far, _

But why set myself up for disaster?

_And I, I've got you down, I know you by heart, and you don't even know where I start._

Wow, I knew him so well by this point. I knew every laugh, and every shirt. I knew Cam Fisher so good that it was scary, because he couldn't even remember my homeroom.  
_  
Talk to yourself, talk to the tears, Talk to the man who put you here, and don't wait for the sky to clear._

It was a shame that he couldn't figure it out on his own. It was so obvious, no one changes their feelings like I did. He chose to wait this crossroad out, not even realizing the damage and that he was the one to cause it. _  
_

_Oh, just know I'm right here hoping  
that you'll come in with the rain._

Waiting, hoping wanting Cam was the scariest thing I've ever felt. Yet I felt lost without it.

_I've watched you so long, screamed your name, I don't know what else I can say._

Spending months lingering around, putting feelings I otherwise kept guarded out there, only to be left. Wondering what happened and how things with Cam changed so quickly, how he had someone else and I didn't even know it.

_But I'll leave my window open, us I'm too tired at night for all these games._

But you could say that what happened doesn't matter now, that I've moved on, but it wouldn't be true because I was still holding on. If ever Cam realized Kristen wasn't who he wanted, I'd be there. But if he can go up and down, so could I. This thing with Cam and me was a yoyo, an emotional yoyo that had known chance of ever ending until someone gave in and spoke their mind.

_Just know I'm right here hoping that you'll come in with the rain._

And I'd wait around my whole life for that moment, if I never get over him.

_

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_If you review, I promise I'll write my surprise ending story for english then post it up

:)


	4. And I hurt myself by hurting you

I wrote this awhile back. Of all the one-shots this one is the most true. Everything in this is 100% true. The most real, feeling filled thing I've ever written.

( Hurt by Christina was the song I listen to for this one.)

* * *

You're not excited. Why should you be? So what his class is out of health and back in P.E with yours. You gave up on him a long time ago. Yo-yo relationships are unhealthy. And wasting your time on a guy who's obviously attached to the hip with a girl, who reciprocates half the feelings, is pretty desperate, among many other things.

"You know who's out there right?" you ask Alicia the only person who really knows about your obsession.

"Yes Dyl, I know." She says as you open up the doors to the gym, and of course his face is there smiling. Not at you, but still he was smiling. And his smile to you is vile. Because it's his smile that got you here.

"You know Dylan, for a girl who doesn't like Cam Fisher; you pay a lot of attention to him" Alicia quips in her most matter-of-fact voice. The two of you are walking leisurely down the hall after your first PE class. You pretend it's because of Alicia but you know it's to stall time, so Cam can come up.

"No I don't"

And like clockwork he comes behind you grabbing the side of your stomach, "Hey Dyl the thrill what's the deal" Cam says smiling. You stare, and Alicia decides now to pick up the pace walking to class, cackling the whole way.

"Hey Cam…" You muster, walking quickly not bothering to wait for a response.

Cam Fisher? Yeah, he makes you a mess, leaves you, the comeback queen an incoherent mess in the hallway. All as he saunters up to Massie Block and you try to figure out what just happened, plus what to do next. You never knew a boy who openly flirted with girls and was able to go back to his girlfriend. One could say you were interested in getting inside his head.

Some days you like him, some days you don't. On that particular day you decided you did because he acted as though he remembered everything about you.

It was another eventful day in Mr. Hands and Mrs. Rightways' P.E. class. Mr. Hands was refereeing the rowdy boys, and 's sub asks about the amount of goalies in a goal. Because your class consist several BOCD girls soccer members, you're trapped on Astroturf that was just covered in snow a few weeks ago. Now it was cleared with the sun shining and you were forced in a brutal game of Death Soccer with Kori Goldman, Kristen, Coral and Becca the top girls on the team. You dodge Kristen's death kicks (hence the name), run in circles with Olivia, Saylene and Layne, and sit in the middle of the field with Cookie, torturing the dumb sub.

"I'm not looking Leesh, he's a douche." You tell Alicia as you retreat back by the goal.

"That's good." She replies dryly.

You're not happy with her lazy answer. So you say something more powerful, "'Cause I hate him. I'm just going to focus on the last game." You say still upset with the reaction. But your comment was only half true. You watch him playing football on the other half of the field, closing you eyes hoping when you opened them they all would go away.

You should've known today was going to end badly. First you were all in you feeling about Cam, then the bus is late picking up the basketball players (including Cam) and cheerleaders (including you). Coach Byrason's camera that was usually attached to her hand was missing and Vader Corners was late because he got braces. But you, Claire and Allie-Rose pulled it together because it's the last time you get to wear that maroon a green uniform, this game had substance.

The fact the Little Springs cheerleaders weren't sucking and you guys weren't losing like you have the last fourteen games, makes you uneasy. Then at half-time after watching Little Springs Cheerleaders rip off your fan favorite cheer, and things kept going downhill. You and Claire mess up the cheers that you taught to the other 7th and 6th graders and BOCD out of the lead.

Cam seems to be the star of the game; he played in every quarter, helping the Tomahawks get half their points. He plays hard, running down the court with all his fourteen year old boy might. He makes a shot, and everyone holds their breath waiting to see if he's made it. However, while everyone waits, Cam falls. You think it's simple, but he doesn't get up. It takes a while to realize he's not laying on the ground in agony of missing the crucial shot, because it went in.

Everything moves in slow motion, Coach Burrow racing to help. Out of instinct you look at Massie, she sits quietly, not a trace of emotion. She did say she didn't come to watch him. Cam is carried to the bleachers, ice on is ankle.

Needless to say, the Tomahawks end their season with a loss.

"Dylan! It's over!" Claire whines in sadness, as you guys wait for the boys. Allie-Rose, Claire and you try to make light of the disappointing afternoon, by making fun of the unending amount of gingers at Little Springs, their snobby girls, and insanely tall lockers.

But no ginger, snob, or locker can make you feel better about the bitter words you said earlier. You feel like crap, like you twisted his ankle. And to add insult to your injury, as you exited the bus, you laugh at the epic fail that was the team, and Cam replies with probably the worst thing he's ever said to you, "Why are you always so negative?"

That statement, changes you forever. Because he's right. You decide to like him, always because he notices your flaw and had the power to share it at his weakest moment. You try to get over his back and forth between you and Massie. Because you sort of get it now. And how can you hate a cute boy in pain?

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Review, if you ever review.


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